Putin has been inviting Trump to hypnotic relaxation seminars ever since the time of the future president’s 2013 beauty contest trip to Russia. With each of Trump’s Russian relaxation treatments, he finds that he has come more and more to appreciate Putins world view of peace and harmony that matches his own fuzzy feelings along these same lines. Of course at Putin’s suggestion the two have agreed that these wonderful encounters should remain their little secret.

It fact it has been rumored that many of Trump’s strange ideas for making America great again (trade wars and screwing with NATO) came out of these cozy, spirit lifting meetings with the Russian killer and his team, I mean, as Trump would say, fantastic Russian leader — much smarter than previous American leaders.

Trump just doesn’t get this same warm vibe at NATO meetings. He thinks these cold European jerks just don’t like his good friend Vlad. The same goes for America’s deep state security agencies — awful people who just don’t love him the way Vlad does.