Return Of The Cain Mutiny Starring Donald John Trump

In the original 1954 The Cain Mutiny movie, Captain Phillip Francis Queeg (Humphrey Bogart) takes command of the destroyer/minesweeper USS Cain. After Captain Queeg begins showing dangerous signs of paranoia the crew becomes increasingly fearful of the captain’s ability to command.

During a day of gunnery target towing, Queeg orders a sharp turn for heading back to Pearl Harbor, but then becomes distracted as he scolds communications officer Keefer over a crewman’s sloppy appearance, ignoring the helmsman’s echoed warnings that the ship is about to run over its own towline. The target line is cut, and Queeg tries to cover up the incident.

Then during an invasion, under fire, Queeg abandons a cluster of landing craft long before he reaches the designated departure point, dropping a yellow dye marker and causing the small boats to have to fend for themselves. Queeg solicits his officers for their support in the matter, but they decline and instead nickname him “Old Yellowstain,” implying spinelessness.

Keefer, believing Queeg to be paranoid, encourages executive officer Maryk (second in command) to consider relieving Queeg on the basis of mental incapacity under Article 184 of Navy Regulations. Maryk heatedly rejects that option, but commences a log detailing the captain’s bizarre behavior.

In another incident, when some strawberries go missing from the officers’ mess, the deranged Queeg is convinced that a sailor has made a duplicate key to the food locker and orders the crew strip-searched to find it, but Keefer learns that Queeg had already been informed that the mess boys had eaten the strawberries. Queeg, however, threatens to revoke keefer’s leave if he reveals that fact to anyone.

Finally during the height of a violent storm, Maryk urges the captain to reverse course into the wind and take on ballast, but Queeg refuses, having received no order from the fleet to change course or maneuver-at-will. When the ship begins to founder, and the officers and crew look to Queeg for guidance, he appears to be frozen, either by indecision or fear. At this point Maryk acts boldly to relieve Queeg. The Caine returns to San Francisco, where Maryk faces a court-martial.

At the court-martial, Keefer loses his nerve and denies ever observing signs of mental illness in Queeg or counseling Maryk to relieve him. But a Navy psychiatrist testifies that Queeg is unfit for command, saying that Queeg shows symptoms of a paranoid personality. Then under a relentless cross-examination, Queeg openly exhibits such behavior and Maryk is acquitted.

The USS America, our ship of state, is currently under the command of a Captain Queeg type, aka. President Donald John Trump. The 64 thousand dollar question is who in this real life episode of the Cain Mutiny will have the courage to step forward and play the part of executive officer Maryk and relieve our bat shit crazy President of command of our foundering vessel of a nation.

In this revised version of the Cain Mutiny President Trump, instead of going nuts over stolen strawberries has accused former President Obama of wire tapping his place of gold, Trump tower, an equally ridiculous concern.

Indeed, how many Republicans will risk their political careers and step forward to save the national ship of state as prescribe in the 25th amendment, Pence, Priebus, members of Trump’s cabinet — who?

{Thanks to Wikipedia for much of the details of the Cain Mutiny move.}

Jim Ridgway, Jr. military writer — author of the American Civil War classic, “Apprentice Killers: The War of Lincoln and Davis.” Christmas gift, yes!

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