You knew I was a snake, so why did you let me in the house? Yes, you let me win.

You didn’t win you big, fat moron. You lost by three million votes, you loser.

You won only if we don’t count, by some Electoral College hocus-pocus, those three million votes, and you reaching out to gain a lot of illegal help from your sleazy pal, Putin. At best you gamed the system. So you’re not the people’s choice by a long shot. Indeed, you’re a faux president.

The point is that the American people didn’t let you in the house; you slithered through a crack. And that crack was a cheating, wholly corrupted Republican Party that had inadvertently greased the skids perfectly suited for a slimy con like you.

But you’re right. A win is a win. And I guess if you manage to destroy the entire electoral process, like some tin pot dictator, I suppose you might win a second term and totally trash our democracy, just as you have trashed everything else you have ever touched in your putrid life.

Jim Ridgway, Jr. military writer — author of the American Civil War classic, “Apprentice Killers: The War of Lincoln and Davis.” Christmas gift, yes!

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